Something that has always bothered me is when married mamas say they are a “single-mom” when their hubby’s are out of town working, or busy with commitments, or working overtime, or whatever.
It took me a while to find out why.
Then after talking to a single mom friend, I found the answer.
As married women we take SO much for granted with our hubby’s.
We need a break from the kids? Just gotta make it until hubs is home then we can escape to a coffee shop.
Overwhelmed with housework? Ask your hubby to pitch in (they may complain about it, but usually they’ll assist in some way)
Who’s going to watch the kids while I pick up an extra shift? Oh right, hubby is home that night.
Forgot to get milk? Just ask hubby to grab some on the way home.
Have a bill to pay? Good thing hubby is working overtime.
You get the point.
The thing is, we as married women rely SO MUCH on our hubby’s. So when they are away we feel like a single mom. But, we aren’t. We have access to our hubby’s support almost 24/7.
Is it tough when they’re gone? Absolutely. It is freaking exhausting. I am always frazzled by the time Brian cones hone from a work trip.
But, we don’t need to worry about making ends meet on one income.
We don’t need to worry about housework AND making ends meet on one income.
We don’t need to worry about our kids well-being, the housework, AND making ends meet on one income. PLUS all the other chaos that comes with being a mama.
We don’t need to do it all ourselves.
When we as married women say we are “single-momming” we are doing such a disservice to those women that are single-momming 24/7. They do need to do all those things, and they often don’t get the support from their child’s dad like we do from our hubby’s. They truly are amazing! They have all my love, respect, and support as they take on their parenting journey on their own.
So let’s stop with the “single-mom” and let’s replace it with: parenting solo. Because that’s what it is. We are not single. We are just parenting solo for a short time.